The Tainted Tiddler
A Poem About A Petty Pimple
Tiddler was a petty pimple.
He pushed,
he pried,
he pinched until he popped what was simple.
Tiddler loved to crawl under the skin
with his skeevy insults
and smuggish grin.
Whenever he dined,
he refused to tip
when his waitress skimped on
his picky quips.
“Quarter the tomato,
dry the pickle,
soak the beef
in a briny dip.
Sear the buns,
make my onions pink,
shave the ice,
into my bubbly sip.”
Tiddler would impatiently twipple
until his meal was served.
When the arduous task was done,
Tiddler would take exactly one bite,
one sip,
then run.
He’d race to his wicked sleigh,
tailgating dismayed student drivers
as play.
Tiddler never saw a soul
that he wouldn’t tickle
with his porcupine quills.
and sticky grime.
A skilled crippler
of peaceful time.
A whipper of patience,
stopping order on our dime.
A terror at retail stores,
a spore anytime a business
opened their doors.
Tenacious Tiddler the rapacious boar,
trampling reasonable rules for a petty score.
He nipped,
he whined,
he threatened,
he wrecked whatever peace he could find.
An ingrown hair,
an itch far from reach,
a hungry leech,
too much to bear.
Store clerks hid,
diners closed,
the town grew quiet,
when the Tiddler rose.
They’d pay their toll
and let him play,
hoping that the Tiddler
would go away.
And when he left,
the townsfolk sighed.
The nightmare over,
when calm arrived.
Yet even now,
past twilight’s reach,
you’ll hear him hiss
and softly screech.
For a Tiddler lurks
in every town.
One petty prick
that brings you down.
So check your Tiddlers,
big or small.
For the tiny terrors
taint us all.
If you enjoyed this poem, you might also enjoy my other mischievous creature tales:
The Quibbling Gibbler
Pivel was a sniveling soulpiddling with pretension how a train eats coal.Pivel often found quibbling and gibbling until the snot escapes his gyrating face.A dibbling snibbler fueled by disgrace.Pivel never found a piddle that he didn't want to fiddle
The Sceebly Squiggler
The Quivl is a sceeby squiggler with his nivil hips and bony grip givers and chiseled biters.